I’m back in America. I know. It’s weird. My Korean experience (I’m referring to me living in Korea, not some last minute relationship I had with a Korean. I’m not that lucky), but anyway, my Korean experience is over. Now I’m forced to talk about it with everyone I meet. You know what that means! Yeap! I’m forced into a very weird talk about the political climate between the U.S. and North Korea all of the time. This is how the conversation usually goes:
“So, you just got back from where?”
“Oh, I thought you said North Korea.”
They never think that. They are just setting themselves up for this question:
“So, what’s it like over there with all the … you know?”
Babies fighting over Twitter? Yeah, I know. “It’s not that bad.”
“But, like, what do the Koreans think about it?”
I’m not a mind reader. “They seem calm.”
“Oh, that’s good. I wouldn’t be.”
Yeah, well they have been dealing with this for awhile, if you forgot what you learned in 5th grade history. “Yeah, I was pretty nervous.” No, I slept like a baby all the time.
“Wow, well I’m glad you are back.”
Why? You are my dentist, not my mom. “Me too.” [Forced smile] But only because I really wanted to eat some Panera Bread. [Real smile because I’m thinking about a Panera Bread cookie.]
Then they talk some more, but I usually stop listening and just think about Panera Bread.
So that has been my life for the last week or so. Wow, I have not been back that long. It feels like nothing has changed though. Being unemployed makes time into a flat circle.
I’ve been thinking about how to sum up my year in Korea. My first thought was rap album, obviously, because I had this picture to use.
Which is clearly an early 2000’s rap album cover… Okay, maybe an amateur boy band cover, with a girl on it. But you get what you paid for.
So, I had to rule that out. But I’m going to keep the title Bye Bye Yellow Haze to keep the dream alive.
Unfortunately, I cannot summarize my Korean experience (again, the country, not a man) in words. Maybe I’ll try to make picture retelling. Like a comic book! Possible titles for my comic book about Korea:
Amee Do Poos
Ababe (Someone in India called me that, it’s not about Korea but still relevant to this year.)
The Incredible Amy
The Amazing Amy
The Sensational Amy (Do you get it? I’m doing Spider-man.)
The Adventures of the Forever Invisible Woman
Invisagirl (Like Invisalign, but instead of straightening teeth, I straighten bad guys. So they don’t do crimes anymore. That one came out weird.)
E-2 (Is about my visa or am I experiment 2? We’ll never know.)
Wow, all of those are gems. This needs to happen.
But if you ask a question about Korea, I will probably try to answer it! That’s all I got.